by Valerie Tookes
One of my favorite new tools is from Danielle LaPorte and her soul shaking book, “The FireStarter Sessions.” The book itself, cover to cover, is dripping with pure insight and inspiration but the biggest take away that I am working with at the moment, both personally and with my health coaching clients, is this simple little question:
How do you want to feel?
This tool is tiny enough to be carried with you, taken out and used at any moment but try this: first thing in the morning, before you even get out of bed ask yourself:
How DO you want to feel at the end of your day?
What I love about this question is that it is deceptively simple, straightforward and easy to remember. Yet beneath that simplicity is a surprisingly powerful clarifying statement that can allow your day to day choices to be so much easier to make.
Most mornings, when you wake up and know that you have a busy and full day ahead, what comes up for you? Maybe you feel a bit of tension or stress about how it will all get done. Maybe you are assessing how much energy that you have versus how much will be required of you. Tomorrow morning, pause for just a beat to ask yourself the question and then lay quietly and listen for the answer.
At the end of my day I want to feel…
loving and loved
Of course, the response varies day to day but whatever the answer may be on any given day, hold that intention in your heart. Write it on the bathroom mirror or on a slip of paper you stash in your wallet or in your lunch bag. Then, as you move through the day, and as tasks and unforeseen circumstances come up, check in with your intention.
Will eating at my desk while checking email and reading files help me to feel grounded? Will calling my mom, just to say hi, help me to feel connected? Will saying no to an invitation from a friend help me to feel empowered? Will holding the door open for the person behind me help me to feel of service?
If the answer is yes, go for it and put yourself all in for that choice.
If the answer is no, then let that choice go and move on without guilt about the decision because it was thoughtfully made based on your heart’s clear intention.
I wholeheartedly agree with Zen teacher, Cheri Huber, when she said “our lives are the result of what we give our attention to.” In a world that is so busy, with so many distractions and so many things and opportunities to reply to and choices to make, this tiny little tool has a huge impact. It can feel like the guiding light, the through line and the self-loving support that you need to arrive, at the end of your day (week, month, year and life) feeling pretty close to the intention that you hold dear for yourself.
So, how DO you want to feel? Let us know in the comments below!
Using a wholehearted approach to wellness, she helps clients to meet themselves exactly where you are with courage and curiosity allowing their bodies the opportunity to change from a place of love and belonging, self-compassion and worthiness.
You can find her at www.herholistichealth.com.